In his new book released on November 1, Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing, actor Matthew Perry opens up about his battle with addiction and what he’s learned along the way. His memoir is full of valuable insights for anyone struggling with a substance use disorder—or anyone who simply wants to learn more about what it’s like to be in recovery.
Lesson #1: Addiction Doesn’t Discriminate
Matthew Perry became a household name when he was just 24 for his portrayal of the goofy and awkward Chandler Bing on the NBC hit-sitcom Friends. However, his fame and fortune didn’t keep him from struggling with an addiction to alcohol and opioids. In fact, he revealed that his addiction was so out of control that he doesn’t remember filming three entire seasons of Friends. Instead of enjoying his success, he was struggling with intense feelings of depression, loneliness, and self-doubt.
While some people with substance use disorders show obvious signs of their impairment, many keep their struggles hidden. They’re often described as “functional addicts” but the pain they’re experiencing is very real. If they don’t get help, there’s a good chance their condition will continue to deteriorate until they experience a rock bottom moment such as Perry’s hospitalization in 2018 for a burst colon due to painkiller abuse. It wasn’t until doctors gave him a 2% chance of survival that he truly realized how much he had to lose.
Lesson #2: Being Honest Is the First Step Towards a Lasting Recovery
One of the most powerful things that Perry does in his book is to be honest about his struggles with addiction. He doesn’t try to sugarcoat anything or make himself look good; he just lays it all out there for the reader to see—sharing that he was taking 55 Vicodin a day and weighed a mere 128 pounds at the height of his addiction.
Matthew Perry shows us that it’s possible to recover from addiction if we are honest with ourselves about the full extent of our problem. Living in denial only keeps us from reaching our full potential. “My grandfather, the wonderful Alton L. Perry, grew up around an alcoholic father, and as a result, he never touched a drink in his life, all ninety-six long, wonderful years of it. I am not my grandfather,” Perry writes.
Lesson #3: Don’t Be Afraid to Ask for Help
Another important theme in Matthew Perry’s book is the importance of getting help for a substance use disorder. He makes it clear that he couldn’t have gotten sober without the help of professionals, and he urges others in similar situations to seek out treatment resources that can support their unique needs.
This is an important message for anyone struggling with addiction; recovery is possible, but you can’t do it alone. Addiction isn’t a character defect or something you can overcome with mere willpower. It requires medical care from experienced professionals who understand how various biological and environmental factors affect the recovery process.
Lesson #4: It’s OK If You Struggle
Unfortunately, substance use disorders are chronic illnesses that leave you open to relapse. However, a relapse doesn’t mean that you’re not cut out for recovery. Perry estimates that he went through detox 65 times and had 15 rehab stints before finding a treatment approach that best fit his needs. His friends, family, and castmates encouraged him to keep going—and that persistence paid off.
Perry describes life in recovery as “a day-to-day process of getting better.” Friends has remained a cultural touchstone since the mid-’90s, but Matthew Perry admits that he is still trying to find his place in a world without drugs and alcohol. “I think you actually have to have all of your dreams come true to realize they are the wrong dreams,” he writes.
Lesson #5: Never Give Up Hope
Perry’s book is not just about the negatives of addiction—it also celebrates the beauty and strength found in recovery. He emphasizes the importance of creating your own support system, both within your recovery community and outside of it, in order to stay on track. He also encourages readers to take control of their own lives, emphasizing that self-care is essential in order for true healing to occur.
It is possible to overcome addiction, but it takes hard work, dedication, and an unwavering belief in yourself. With the right tools and resources, you can take control of your life and move forward with hope and optimism.
Take the First Step Towards a Brighter Future
Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing is an honest and moving account of one man’s battle with addiction, and it provides valuable insight into what it takes to recover from this disease. If you’re ready to get help for your own substance use disorder, St. Joseph Institute for Addiction is here for you. Contact us today to learn more about our comprehensive Pennsylvania drug and alcohol addiction treatment programs.
Looking for addiction treatment near Altoona, PA? To learn more about SJI Pennsylvania addiction rehab, and our programs, please contact us at (814) 228-8881.
